Building in the Light – Why Sharing Your Journey Matters

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Have you ever had a failed launch, a service that wouldn't sell, or struggled to get something off the ground?

Maybe it’s because you’ve been building in the dark.
In this episode Kristina and Maria discuss why sharing your journey openly, even in the messy middle, can lead to stronger connections, better feedback, and more aligned, successful offers.

They have seen first hand how letting go of perfectionism and embracing authenticity has transformed their business, while creating in isolation poses risk of flops, burnout, and disappointment.  

While building with transparency leads to authentic connection, data, loyal community members and sales. So, tune in to learn how to….

Build. In The. Light.

DM us your questions for a future Q&A episode!

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Transcript

Kristina Bartold (00:02.158)
everyone and welcome to my podcast Community. I'm Christina and I'm a passionate community builder, business owner, investor, and lover of all things sales and marketing. On this show, I bring you top sales and social media tips, plus bring you experts who are going to rock your world when it comes to learning how to grow your community. Community has been my secret sauce in scaling our business and I know it'll be yours too. Enjoy. Hey everyone and welcome to another episode of Community. How about Maria? Hello.

Love when you're here because it's so fun We actually should do and we've not gonna do this today because I think we're episode it out But we should do like another like Caller Daddy community Caller Daddy spin off Were we talking about nothing? People love that one. Were we talking about nothing? wasn't nothing, but it was like no script. I love that. I love that. So fun We should do it sometime So I am so excited because we are gonna talk about something that kind of comes up a lot with social business club members and actually I think comes up a lot with entrepreneurs like

Regularly everywhere and it's this idea of building in the dark and so often when you know we're building whether it be on social or building a Course or we're a membership or whatever it is that we're building. There is a level of us building a Like we feel like there's a need for secrecy like we're feeling like we need to like keep things under wraps or keep it kind of like tight and I actually think the trend on that is changing especially on social to actually change to be more like

Forward and about like really kind of building in the light and like you really showing up Fully so that people are able to like really be part of the journey. So I want to see kind of what your thoughts on that Yeah, I love this topic. I think like also building could be like anything like it could be like a podcast anything you're like working on and This is something I've fallen victim to like so many times, especially at the beginning where I was like, we just have to like, you

figure out what these people want and like create this perfect thing and like make the sales page and get all the messaging and get the offer down and do all these things and like have it all ready and then just like present it to the world this is like perfect polished like beautiful thing that's like you know yeah perfect is like really the right word like here it is everybody and then everyone's gonna like okay like you know maybe we didn't want that or maybe we're actually not that interested in that or maybe

Kristina Bartold (02:19.682)
We love the content of that, the way it's delivered isn't really the way we were expecting or right. And so I think leading up until probably like even like maybe 2020, the way of doing marketing and appearing on social was very like aesthetic feed and everything's perfect. And here's my offer. Look how polished it is. And more and more and more, just going so far away from that, I think, in terms of all content, but especially what we're talking about today, which is like the building phase. And so I think

When you're thinking of building something, do not do what I said, which is like, just build the whole thing in the dark, don't tell anybody about it, don't ask anybody about it, don't mention it's even happening, and then one day just throw it out into the world. We have done that, and it does not go very well. No, it flopped. It flopped. And honestly, that is more, I think, your style than mine.

Which isn't a bad thing I like like myself better than yours and that's now the way that everyone should be working But like I'm more like a come with me kind of person while like you are so Elegant and the stuff that you do your stuff is always so beautiful while I'm messy right like yeah We always talk about this even like we're laughing yesterday because Maria came and worked at my house and I Left a candle lit for 10 hours, and then she was like this is a type B thing like you know So we like laugh about this, but it's so true. I'm like so like

I'm okay with things not being polished. Actually, I got a piece of feedback one time and I remember being so offended and now I'm like in gratitude about it, but I started a new job. It's the last job I've ever had and the guy said to me, you're so okay with mediocre. I was like, my God. And he was like, no, no, like you're okay with it. Like not being perfect. Like you're okay with just trying things and seeing if it works without attachment. And I think that that's like a really been, I think.

helpful to our success because it's been easy for us to be like well that offer didn't work well why don't we try something else or that offer and like I think for you like you put so much intensity into all the things you do that it has to look beautiful and it has to move the needle and I'm kind of like

Kristina Bartold (04:19.406)
We'll be fine. Why don't we just try it right and even this podcast when we launched it I had this idea and two weeks later. I was like it's time like here it is guys Yeah, I a cold like as I recorded the intro the first time and Maria was like why don't you just wait? I was like cuz I can't I can't wait, but so there's a happy medium between the two of us But I think this idea of like us showing up and like building publicly It has people to be with us and they're really bought into what we're doing like as we're doing it before we even sell it So before you're asking anyone for a dollar

You're showing people behind the scenes. showing them inside the sausage, which is always the one I use. You're showing them what's going on so that they're ready to make a really informed choice. Yeah, totally. And I do think, I totally agree. I love the messy action. I'm working on it, work in progress. Me I do think there's a time and place for the perfection, not perfectionism, but the elegance, the sophistication, the making things look beautiful, the making things really well done and professional, whatever.

But the time and place for that is not the building phase. That, I think, is the big difference here, and that's what I've learned, is like, because the mistake people make is you create this thing that you think is so perfect and polished, and you spend all this time and energy on it, and you put it out into the world, and it's, people don't receive it the way you think, because you didn't build it with them. And this has been transformational for us in our business, is like, so building in a light, like telling our audience, oh, we're thinking of doing this, we might do this, getting their feedback along the way. But also, like,

Integrating everything they're saying into what we're actually building. That's the like flip side of it So I think there are so many positives Maybe we can go into the positives of like building in the light and why we think that's a good idea Yeah But then on the flip side of that you actually also get all the live feedback and then that's the game-changing thing is that then you implement that into what you're building and then what you're building ends up being so much more in alignment with your audience and they're way more likely to buy it mm-hmm well, I even think like one of the main reasons or the pros and you kind of touched on this already is like

that feedback from your ideal clients, right? So when you're building something and you're like, you know, I always use this example of a retreat, but like we did one retreat a few years ago and I loved the retreat and I wanted to do a second one and I had such a good time. And we tried to pitch a winter retreat and people were like, are you joking? Like no winter retreat here in Canada. our audience wasn't quite what it is now, like whatever. And I was so disappointed, but I was like mid-booking an Airbnb. Like I was like, my God, like I've coordinated this whole retreat.

Kristina Bartold (06:37.348)
And then we did a winter retreat this year and it was easy to sell right because I had enough audience I had enough like kind of like a Trust and it took time, but we also we were like what do people think about this Airbnb? We would do a poll You know we did private invitations to people before we started selling it to see what people feedback was like so people respond back to me like I love that hate the date Like love that like calling one snowy like love that like you know this this and this like we were able to get that feedback

So I think that's like one of the biggest pieces is like and you're often building like kind of like a waitlist for whatever you're doing So I always say that like I'm like redoing anything like building a waitlist so that this way you're getting those people while they're in the FOMO and while they're in the like excitement of it and they're like yeah, this is something I'd want to be a part of yeah, and It also like what you said about the first retreat like when you're mid you're about to click book on the Airbnb and and we put a poll that's like Would you love to come to this retreat and every single person votes no? Yeah, like that was tough

But could you imagine if we booked the Airbnb booked the private chef plan the entire weekend set up all these vendors and then put it out? like hey guys we have this awesome retreat. Yeah, all the cool stuff about it. It's sick It's gonna be so fun, and then no one buys it mm-hmm then you're Not only stuck with all these like commitments. You've made to vendors and things like that But you just wasted so much time and energy like making a sales page do like all of the time that you've invested in creating that offer right so I think that feedback piece is like huge

because then you can actually figure out what your audience wants and then implement that feedback and that's what we learned with our course too. We ran a course where we taught people how to do Instagram and as we're building it with them, we're doing a beta group and they're like, what we thought they valued and what they actually valued were two totally different things. It was nuts. Actually that's gonna be an example that we use for the rest of time because what we thought people valued was knowledge.

Yes, we were education. Here's how you do it guys We're like here are these modules want more modules more modules to come like we were like obsessed with making these modules and then they would come to these calls and they would be obsessed with each other and like the coaching and the community yes, and we were like We almost didn't even include the community as part of it. Yes, and then when we launched our membership We were like do we put the modules in there and people do watch them. I think we get some traction on them It's the live calls people are after you you guys social business club people

Kristina Bartold (08:59.012)
You're after the live calls. We know it. We know it. So it's like, and if you haven't joined, join the socialbusinessclub.ca. Use the code podcast for your first month for a dollar. Amazing community in there where we talk all things social. But like, what was amazing about that was that we really learned that it was like, people actually wanted more access. And so, but if we had just been like so head down, not taking feedback, not doing a beta, building like really, really in the dark, which we kind of did. We this in dark. I think it would have been, we probably wouldn't have even gotten to the point with the membership.

And I think too the thing with when you're building and getting the feedback in live time You kind of also need to know like what questions to ask people because I feel like when we were building our course sort of in the dark We were asking people like what they would want from it But it was almost so vague that they like couldn't really tell us. Yeah, you know instead of being like hey What would you want from a social media course? They might say oh, you know, I might want to this I'm gonna learn that like what if we asked them like

you know, we're designing a social media course, it's going to have, you know, templates, it's going have a really educational component where you can watch videos, and then there's also going to be a community component where there's like live calls and you can be in this group and chat with other entrepreneurs. Like, of those things, which would be the most valuable to you? Yeah. That's a very different question, right? Totally. So as you're building, thinking of these pieces and getting that feedback is so great. And then why don't we talk about like, what are the other benefits to building in the light?

Well, I think one is like, you know again getting that feedback the other thing is really just like people want to be part of your journey and I think that's been really cool and us watching like like even our business like the other day I was in the office and this woman came by who like I don't really know that well and she was like, oh my god, I used to work with you at the University I was like, yeah, I totally remember that and she was like, oh my god, this was like a little side hustle you put together. I this is crazy. And I was like, yeah, it's kind of crazy. Like this has turned into so much but people want to be part of your journey. People want to be part of your success.

And I think that's something we really underestimate as humans is that we think that like almost like people don't want to see us be successful. Like that's always kind of our default as like negativity. And I think really like we need to lean into the fact that people like want to be part of the journey because if they don't need you today, they might need you tomorrow. And so if you're continuing to be kind of top of mind for people, that's really great. And even Aaron Spivek, who's one of our newer mentors, the founder of Hush blankets, like they're building the founders club.

Kristina Bartold (11:18.933)
I've never built a community like they're very open about it right like yeah Aaron's like I literally I'm like a blanket man like I'm built these blankets and those are some good blankets There's some great blankets. He's done some other really cool stuff, too But so he talks about these these blankets and all of that and he's doing stuff You know all this other stuff nothing ever community oriented right so he's being very humble and saying like I'm learning Right and even like when we do our onboarding calls they ask us they're like what kind of feedback do you have like? What do you like and I was like hey like I actually would like this. This is a lot of guys

And they were like, and I was like, I've never actually ever been part of a community with so many men, which is the Norman business. I'm just so used to networking with women. And they were like, that's interesting. We're actually 60-40. We didn't realize. it was so interesting. But it was such a good opportunity for them to have conversation. But they're building forward, right? They're asking for feedback. They're asking for us what we think. So I think for us, it's like the same thing, where it's like one of the huge disadvantages apart from getting feedback from people.

Really just like kind of that show up and watching like I can't wait till founders club has a million people in it or a hundred thousand people in it And along the way we've been watching. that first retreat. you watch this Yeah, and there's something about getting it on the ground everyone wants to get it on the ground on something Yeah, and I think when you operate that way and when you're like two big things coming to mind right now that I think are both like game-changers Could be game-changers in your business one is like authenticity is queen right now. Yep

The content that's doing well on social, like literally last week I did an experiment where I created two extremely beautiful posts about my trip to Tulum and the photography was great and I edited them beautifully and I added this like cute text and little icons and they were so stunning and there wasn't much story behind them. They were more just like aesthetic, beautiful, whatever. And then, and those took me like hours. And then I posted, and then I posted. Couldn't be me.

Photo like a series of photos of my mom and I that I literally put together in two minutes wrote a quick caption That was like happy birthday threw it up and it got way more engagement and views than the other two posts Yeah, so it's like people are people want that like authentic content. That's not super polished That's real that they can relate to that makes

Kristina Bartold (13:24.549)
You feel like you're like a friend of theirs, you know, like it turns them into a fan who wants to buy things from you and all those other great things But it also makes your content go so far because that's the content that's performing law right now Like that's what people want to see they're sick of this like polished perfect little social media thing that we had going on basically from the start of social media until a few years ago Yeah, and I think more and more that type of content is what's Resonating with people and like you're just gonna go so much further with that type of thing and then also when you're building it at the end when you

put it out into the world. have all these people who felt like they built it with you and are invested and were along for the ride and like either want to buy it or tell their friends about it or whatever they do, right? So I think that's so big. And then the second thing that was coming up for me when you're talking is like, when you operate that way, you don't have to pretend to be something you're not. And this killed me at the beginning of our business. This was like, I think one of the biggest reasons I hit burnout so hard was because I was trying to pretend we...

knew all these things about business and were super professional and were perfect and like didn't swear and didn't do this and didn't do that and that's not a good way to show up as a person to try and be something you're not and like put on this facade of whatever that looks like right but when you're just honest and you're like like exactly what you said about Aaron like he's like I'm just trying this out I'm doing my best but I'm here every day and I'm listening to your feedback and like I've never grown a community before I'm not going to pretend I have but

He's just being so authentically himself that when you're operating that way, you're just gonna be more successful as a business owner because you don't have this distance between who you actually are and who you're pretending to be when you show up in your business. Totally. And I think it's so easy, especially in the beginning, to feel that. When you're building, I even remember at the beginning when we started the social snippet, we created the social snippet Instagram, and we were like, we need to grow this following fast because who's gonna work with us if they see we have 100 followers?

Someone literally said that to me. Yeah, it was rude We're coming for people someone also told me we're gonna break up with me so Hot take hot take I was like if anything she should break up with me. No way we're in it for life I'm always like Maria the next business is what's happening. So she's like who you can you do one without me? Just like what? always need a side project. I always yes, know But right now it's growing a child. That's what's up for you but it's it's I think for us it's like really like

Kristina Bartold (15:42.581)
Yeah, like it's been like an interesting thing where at the beginning we were like we need to grow our account fast because we need to show people how we can do it and we know how to do it and like blah blah blah and then we were kind like why and Clients were coming to us when we had a hundred followers Ask us to manage social media and we were getting asked to do stuff with 200 followers and 500 followers a thousand followers and I think we're like maybe 4,500 followers or something like that maybe even a little less and it's like Do we get leads on social yeah? Yeah?

You know because we're at least one step ahead two steps ahead three steps ahead four thousand steps ahead like whatever that looks like and so I think like not putting that pressure on yourself like to be like Of course there's things out there where you're not gonna buy things like you know you become a business coach And you never run a business like that's probably not a good fit, but I think it's like that that constant persistent pressure to be Perfect and be like you know eight-figure business owner or whatever like three years in a row I wanted us to hit seven figures like three years in a row, and we just missed it

And like, I'm like, I could be like, that sucks. But also I know most businesses fail by this point. Amen. And the amount of businesses that, like women-led businesses that like make seven figures, less than 1%. So it's like, look we're still beating all the odds, but it's still so easy to look at other things, right? So I think for us, it's just remembering like, you know when you're building publicly, you get to bring all these people with you.

and they get to celebrate your success. And there's gonna be cringy moments. There's gonna be things you do that are cringy and sometimes I'll see that people will share posts and I'm like, they didn't share their stories, they probably shared in the DMs. Like, who is this? And I know who it is. But it's just remembering this is the joy of building.

because five years from now we're going to be be like, hey, you guys remember when we were in that office in Waterloo and then now we have this or, you know, like we're like, we're able to really like kind of bring people along. Yeah, and your audience comes on that journey with you and there's advantages at all parts of the journey, right? That's the part I missed so strongly in the beginning is like, I thought if we were authentic about how small we were and how new we were, it would turn people away, but there were advantages to being that small and there were advantages to being that new. Like we've never worked harder than we did that first year.

Kristina Bartold (17:49.112)
And you know, it was like we were so eager, we were learning worked with us. Yeah. Like, there were so many advantages to where we were at, and I was trying to pretend we were further along. And that distance just doesn't do well for you or your business. Yeah. Well, I love this. It's such a good conversation. think for those of you who need encouragement about where you're at, even if this is your day one, not comparing it to our day 1,000, it's probably actually what we are, like,

You know don't compare yourself to other people, but I think you know really just showing up consistently There's nothing to be ashamed of there And I think just showing up and showing like what you're excited about and if you are starting a business that you're really passionate and excited about People are gonna want to see that and there's no wrong way to do it like how do you build in the light? You just you just build your post and stories you're asking people you're showing them what you're up to You're just taking them along for the journey and that can look however you want it to look, but just bring them along with you

Yeah. Well, Maria, love ya. Love building with ya. Love ya. Love building in the light with ya. More building in the light from us. Yes. To come. Stay tuned for the next Call Her Community episode. We will take all questions that we can actually do a Q &A. Ooh, that would be so fun. Okay, we're gonna do a Q &A. If you listen to this podcast, send us any questions that you have. Yeah, Spotify comments, Instagram DMs, wherever you can find us, shoot us a question and we're gonna do a Q &A episode. That would be so fun. Yay. Thanks so much for listening to Community with Me.

Christina Bartold, and I'm just so excited to continue the conversations. If you're looking to grow your community and learn more about social, join us at thesocialbusinessclub.ca and use the code podcast to get your first month for a dollar. Share this episode with your friends and on social or leave a review. It means the world.